| | FIS Incident
This really happened to me today, athough not to the extent that I reported. Nonethless, I began to wonder how the story would be reported in some local newspaper in Chicago. This is what I came up with...
It was an ugly scene at Loyola Law School as Muslim Law Student Irfan Shuttari was caught cleaning his feet on the 5th floor of the Law Library. Eyewitnesses claim that an unidentified student walked into the Men's Restrooms on the 5th floor and was shocked to see a student with his foot in the sink. At the sight, the student proclaimed, "Whoa that's nasty bro!" At this proclamation, Mr. Shuttari took his foot out of the sink, only to miss his placed slipper on the floor and slip under the sink. The unidentified student notified Loyola Security immediately. When asked of the incident, Mr. Shuttari resolved, "All that was said is hearsay by the unidentified student! It was a simple case of FIS - Foot In Sink. I want my rights - does the Patriot Act highlight anything restricting my right and ability to wash my feet at sinks in public restrooms? I demand fair and honest treatment for all victims of FIS!" Authorities later concluded that Mr. Shuttari had no intent for devious acts in washing his feet, and only wanted to prove to the rest of the world that his feet were in fact very clean. Loyola Law waived the charges against Mr. Shuttari, who was found in a crouched position, in a corner of the 5th floor of the Law Library. Although saying that he was simply 'praying', authorities believe he was simply hiding in embarrassment. All University campuses are now on high alert for such incriminating acts. Individuals that witness such acts are asked to inform campus security immediately.
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| | Posted 5/10/2007 5:22 PM - 81 Views - 4 eProps - 2 comments
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